It’s no secret that social media has changed the way we interact with each other.
According to Statista, over 3 billion people worldwide use social media regularly.
And with so many people using social media, it’s no surprise that it’s also changed the way we date and interact with our partners.
But when it comes to our relationships, social media can be a double-edged sword.
On the one hand, it can help us stay connected to our partners and feel more involved in their lives.
But, on the other hand, it can also be a source of conflict and tension as we compare our relationship to others’ or snoop through our partner’s online activity.
So if you notice “my husband looks at Craigslist personals” and wonder how you can tell if your partner’s social media use is healthy or crossing into dangerous territory, here are a few things to look out for.
In this article, we’ll explore some of the signs that your partner’s social media use might be causing problems in your relationship.
What Are Relationship Red Flags?
When it comes to relationships, there are certain behaviors or activities that can be considered “red flags.”
These red flags may be warning signs that the relationship is not healthy or that your partner is not someone you should be with.
Such signs may include but are not limited to possessiveness, jealousy, controlling behavior, infidelity, and violence.
While some of these behaviors may be considered normal in a relationship, it’s important to pay attention to their frequency and severity.
If you notice that your partner’s social media use is causing problems in your relationship, it may be time to have a discussion about it.
12 Social Media Red Flags in a Relationship
There are many ways that social media can cause problems in a relationship. Below are 12 red flags to look out for:
1. Your Partner Is Spending More Time on Social Media Than With You
If you feel like you’re competing with social media for your partner’s attention, it’s a sign that there could be a problem.
Of course, we all need some time to ourselves, and it’s healthy to have interests outside of our relationship.
But if your partner is consistently choosing to spend time online instead of with you, it’s something worth talking about.
2. Your Partner Is Secretive or Evasive About Their Social Media Activity
Does your partner get defensive when you ask about their social media use?
Do they close out of their browser or turn their phone screen away from you when they’re using it?
If your partner is being secretive about their social media activity, it could be a sign that they’re up to something they don’t want you to know.
3. Your Partner Is Liking or Commenting on Other Women’s Photos
If you’ve noticed your partner liking or commenting on other women’s photos, it’s definitely something to be concerned about.
This is especially true if they’re leaving flirty or suggestive comments.
Of course, there’s nothing wrong with admiring someone else’s appearance, but if your partner is doing it excessively, it could be a sign that they’re not satisfied with what they have at home.
4. You Find Out Your Partner Has Created a Secret Email Account
If you find out that your partner has created a secret email account, it definitely causes concern.
This is especially true if they’re using it to communicate with people they wouldn’t want you to know about.
If your partner is being secretive about their email activity, it’s definitely something to be worried about.
5. Your Partner Starts Acting Differently Towards You
If you notice that your partner is starting to act differently toward you, it could signify that they’re cheating.
If they’re suddenly more distant or short-tempered, it could be because they’re feeling guilty about something.
If your partner starts acting out of character, it’s definitely worth taking note of.
6. You Find Suspicious charges on Your Partner’s Credit Card
If you notice any suspicious charges on your partner’s credit card, it could be because they’re paying for something related to their affair.
This could include hotel rooms, dating site subscriptions, or even gifts for their new partner.
If you’re suspicious of credit card activity, it’s definitely worth investigating further.
7. You Notice Your Partner Is Working Late a Lot
If your partner suddenly starts working late a lot, it could be because they’re using that time to meet up with someone else.
If they start making up excuses for why they can’t spend time with you, it’s definitely something to be worried about.
8. Your Partner Is Suddenly More Interested in Their Appearance
If your partner starts taking more care of their appearance and dressing nicer, it could be a sign that they’re trying to impress someone else.
If they’re spending more time on their hair and makeup or working out more, it’s definitely something to pay attention to.
9. Your Partner Is Hiding Their Phone From You
If your partner starts hiding their phone from you, it’s a definite red flag.
They may start keeping it in their pocket or bag all the time or even lock it with a password.
If you can’t access their phone, it’s a sign that they’re trying to hide something from you.
10. You Catch Your Partner in Lies
If your partner starts lying to you about small things, it’s a sign that they may be cheating.
They may lie about where they were, what they’re doing, or who they’re with.
If you catch your partner in lies, it’s time to have a serious conversation.
11. Your Partner Is Excessively Jealous or Possessive
If your partner is suddenly possessive or excessively jealous, it may be a sign of cheating.
They may start demanding to know where you are and who you’re with all the time.
They may also get angry if you talk to other people or look at other people.
If your partner is exhibiting these behaviors, it’s time to have a serious conversation.
12. Your Partner Is Pulling Away From You
If your partner is pulling away from you emotionally, it’s a sign that they may be cheating.
They may stop talking to you about their feelings or their day.
They may also stop spending time with you and start spending more time with friends or alone.
If your partner is pulling away from you, it’s time to have a serious conversation.
What Should One Do After the Red Flags Clash?
If you notice any of these red flags in your relationship, it’s important to talk to your partner about it.
Marriage and family therapist Dr. Danielle Forshee tells Bustle, “It is essential to be direct with your partner if you feel like something is off in the relationship or have a hunch that they may be cheating on you.”
She adds, “The best way to get to the bottom of things is to have an honest conversation about your concerns.
Often, we allow our minds to run wild with thoughts and what-ifs, making us even more upset.
If you are feeling suspicious or jealous, it is important to talk to your partner directly so that they can help ease your mind or put your worries to rest.”
At the end of the day, it’s up to you whether or not you want to confront your partner about your concerns.
If you decide to have that conversation, Bustle’s advice is to “remain calm and avoid accusatory language.”
If your partner is cheating on you, that’s their decision and their responsibility – not yours.
So, do whatever you need to do in order to take care of yourself and feel better in the situation.
And remember: you deserve someone who would never even think to cheat on you in the first place.
How to Better Spot Red Flags for Next Time?
Unfortunately, you can’t always control whether or not your partner will cheat on you.
However, you can try to be more mindful in future relationships about any red flags that may pop up.
Some possible signs that your partner might cheat, according to Cosmopolitan, include if they’re “withholding information about their whereabouts,” “unwilling to introduce you to their friends or family,” or “suddenly spending a lot of time with someone new and won’t let you meet them.”
If you notice any of these things, it’s essential to have an honest conversation with your partner about your concerns.
Then, if they’re genuinely committed to you, they’ll be understanding and willing to work on whatever issue is causing these problems.
But if they’re not, you might want to reconsider your relationship.
Of course, there are also many perfectly innocent reasons why someone might look at Craigslist personals.
Maybe they’re just curious about what’s out there or looking for something specific that they can’t find on other dating sites.
Either way, it’s essential to communicate with your partner about your concerns.
By being open and honest with each other, you truly build a strong and lasting relationship.
If you’re worried that your partner is looking at Craigslist personals, the best thing to do is talk to them about it.
If they’re not willing to be open and honest with you about what’s going on, it could be a sign that they’re not committed to the relationship.
However, if they are willing to talk about the issue and work together to address it, it could be a sign that the relationship is worth saving.